Verse

Psalm 23:1-4

The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing.
   He makes me lie down in green pastures,
he leads me beside quiet waters,
   he refreshes my soul.
He guides me along the right paths
   for his name’s sake.
Even though I walk
   through the darkest valley, a
I will fear no evil,
   for you are with me;
your rod and your staff,
   they comfort me.

Quote

Earl Nightingale,

"Our attitude towards others determines their attitude towards us."

Joke

I once had a dream I was floating in an ocean of orange soda.

It was more of a fanta sea.

Verse

Psalm 22:9,10

Yet you brought me out of the womb;
   you made me trust in you, even at my mother’s breast.
From birth I was cast on you;
   from my mother’s womb you have been my God.

Quote

Jeff Bezos,

"If you can't tolerate critics, don't do anything new or interesting."

Joke

A guy walks into a bar... and he was disqualified from the limbo contest."

Verse

Psalm 1:1-3

Blessed is the one
   who does not walk in step with the wicked
or stand in the way that sinners take
   or sit in the company of mockers,
but whose delight is in the law of the Lord,
   and who meditates on his law day and night.
That person is like a tree planted by streams of water,
   which yields its fruit in season
and whose leaf does not wither—
   whatever they do prospers.

Quote

Epictetus,

"The key is to keep company only with people who uplift you, whose presence calls forth your best."

Joke

How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh?

Ten tickles.

Verse

Genesis 3:6,7

When the woman saw that the fruit of the tree was good for food and pleasing to the eye, and also desirable for gaining wisdom, she took some and ate it. She also gave some to her husband, who was with her, and he ate it. Then the eyes of both of them were opened, and they realized they were naked; so they sewed fig leaves together and made coverings for themselves.

Quote

Walter Lippmann,

"Where all men think alike, no one thinks very much."

Joke

What time did the man go to the dentist?

Tooth hurt-y.

Verse

Psalm 33: 4,5

For the word of the Lord is right and true;
   he is faithful in all he does.
The Lord loves righteousness and justice;
   the earth is full of his unfailing love.

Quote

Anatole France,

"An education isn't how much you have committed to memory, or even how much you know. It's being able to differentiate between what you know and what you don't."

Joke

What does a lemon say when it answers the phone?

"Yellow!"

Verse

Psalm 54:1,2

Save me, O God, by your name;
vindicate me by your might.
Hear my prayer, O God;
listen to the words of my mouth.

Quote

Billie Jean King,
"Don't let anyone define you. You define yourself."

Joke

I thought the dryer was shrinking my clothes.

Turns out it was the refrigerator all along.

Verse

Romans 1:18:20

The wrath of God is being revealed from heaven against all the godlessness and wickedness of people, who suppress the truth by their wickedness, since what may be known about God is plain to them, because God has made it plain to them. For since the creation of the world God’s invisible qualities—his eternal power and divine nature—have been clearly seen, being understood from what has been made, so that people are without excuse.

Quote

Martin Luther King, Jr.,
"I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin, but by the content of their character."

Joke

What do you call a poor Santa Claus?
St. Nickel-less.

Verse

Romans 4:7,8

“Blessed are those
   whose transgressions are forgiven,
whose sins are covered.
Blessed is the one
   whose sin the Lord will never count against them.”

Quote

Thorton Wilder,

"Seek the lofty by reading, hearing and seeing great work at some moment every day."

Joke

What do you call someone with no body and no nose?

Nobody knows.

Verse

“I know that you can do all things;
  no purpose of yours can be thwarted.
You asked, ‘Who is this that obscures my plans without knowledge?’
  Surely I spoke of things I did not understand,
  things too wonderful for me to know.
“You said, ‘Listen now, and I will speak;
  I will question you,
  and you shall answer me.’
My ears had heard of you
  but now my eyes have seen you.
Therefore I despise myself
  and repent in dust and ashes.”

Qote

C.S. Lewis ,

"Courage is not simply one of the virtures, but the form of every virtue at the testing point."

Joke

An Irishman walks out of a bar.

Verse

Job 1:20-22

At this, Job got up and tore his robe and shaved his head. Then he fell to the ground in worship 21and said:

“Naked I came from my mother’s womb,
   and naked I will depart.
The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away;
   may the name of the Lord be praised.”
In all this, Job did not sin by charging God with wrongdoing.

Quote

Sydney J. Harris,

"When I hear somebody sigh, 'Life is hard,' I am always tempted to ask, 'compared to what?'"

Joke

What do you call an illegally parked frog?

Toad.

Verse

Hebrews 11:17,18

By faith Abraham, when God tested him, offered Isaac as a sacrifice. He who had embraced the promises was about to sacrifice his one and only son, even though God had said to him, “It is through Isaac that your offspring will be reckoned.

Quote

William James,

"Action may not bring happiness but there is no happiness without action."

Joke

Dad, can you put the cat out?

I didn't know it was on fire.

Verse

Hebrews 10:23-25

Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful. And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching.

Quote

Thorton Wilder,

"Seek the lofty by reading, hearing and seeing great work at some moment every day."

Joke

My wife is really mad at the fact that I have no sense of direction.

So I packed up my stuff and right!

Verse

Hebrews 6:10-12

God is not unjust; he will not forget your work and the love you have shown him as you have helped his people and continue to help them. We want each of you to show this same diligence to the very end, so that what you hope for may be fully realized. We do not want you to become lazy, but to imitate those who through faith and patience inherit what has been promised.

Quote

Henry David Thoreau,

"Success usually comes to those who are too busy to be looking for it."

Joke

What has more letters than the alphabet?

The post office!

Verse

Hebrews 4:12-13

For the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart. Nothing in all creation is hidden from God’s sight. Everything is uncovered and laid bare before the eyes of him to whom we must give account.

Quote

Ruth Gordon,

"Courage is like a muscle. We strengthen it by use."

Joke

Dad, did you get a haircut?

No, I got them all cut!

Verse

Hebrews 3:13,14

But encourage one another daily, as long as it is called “Today,” so that none of you may be hardened by sin’s deceitfulness. We have come to share in Christ, if indeed we hold our original conviction firmly to the very end.

Quote

Cicero,

"Gratitude is not only the greatest of virtues, but the parent of all others."

Joke

A skeleton walks into a bar and says,
'Hey, bartender. I'll have one beer and a mop.